For the longest time, I wondered—what makes a great leader? Are some people just born with it? Does it happen naturally over time? Or is leadership a conscious decision—something you step into with intention?
Maybe you love guiding and inspiring others, so you study the leaders you admire, learning from them and trying to emulate their success. But no matter how much you learn or how hard you try, there’s one truth that remains:
You can’t successfully lead others until you’ve learned to lead yourself.
We all want to make a difference—in our families, communities, and businesses. We want to inspire growth, create change, and impact lives. But real leadership doesn’t start with strategy or influence. It starts within.
The Inner Work Comes First
For years, I believed that if I worked harder, learned more, and pushed myself enough, I would earn the right to lead others. I thought leadership was about knowledge, skills, and techniques. But life had a different lesson for me.
The most powerful leaders didn’t start by changing the world. They started by transforming themselves. They took an honest look at their own thinking, their own patterns, and how they responded to life. They didn’t just talk about growth; they became it.
Before we can guide others, we must first understand how we are navigating our own lives.
- Are we reacting or responding?
- Are we leading from fear or from clarity?
- Are we trying to control outcomes or are we trusting in something deeper?
You Can’t Pour from an Empty Cup
If you’re exhausted, overwhelmed, and caught in cycles of stress, how can you possibly guide someone else toward peace and clarity? If you don’t understand your own emotions and often get stuck in overthinking, how can you help others break free?
Leadership isn’t about fixing others. It’s about truly knowing yourself—and trusting that when the moment comes, you’ll instinctively know how to lead.
Leading Yourself First: The Foundation of True Leadership
Leading yourself means noticing your thinking without trying to control it. It means recognizing how your state of mind affects your decisions, relationships, and energy. It means seeing that transformation isn’t something you do—it’s something that happens when you open yourself up to a new way of seeing life.
Change Happens from the Inside Out
Most people believe they need to change their external world in order to feel better internally. They think if they just get the right job, fix their relationship, or improve their circumstances, they’ll finally feel at peace.
But it doesn’t work that way.
When you shift your understanding of how life works—when you realize that your experience is created from within, not from outside circumstances—everything changes. You stop chasing validation, approval, and security. Instead, you embody the kind of peace and wisdom that others naturally want to follow.
The Call to Lead Starts With You
If you want to help others, start by helping yourself. If you want to lead others, start by leading yourself. Your impact on the world will always be a reflection of the transformation you allow within yourself.
So, ask yourself:
- What would change if you stopped trying to fix everything outside of you and instead focused on deepening your own understanding?
- What if leadership wasn’t about controlling outcomes but about embodying peace so profoundly that others couldn’t help but be inspired?
The world doesn’t need more people forcing change. It needs more people being the change. And that starts with you.
“Good leaders give more than they take.
They focus on sowing not reaping.”
~ John Maxwell
All my love
Sharon
